Create the family you want to have

Monday is Parent Affirmation Day at Help 4 Your Family! 6/4/2012- planning time

Written by, Kate Oliver, MSW, LCSW-C

Doing the best she can

Doing the best she can (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today’s affirmation is short and sweet and we know we all need it.  It is about time.  I know I already posted an affirmation about things happening at the right time.  This one is about how we plan time.  How many of us feel like we are short on time, don’t have enough time, or, when we finally get time to ourselves, we think we will have time to do so many things in a short period of time?  I remember when my kids were little, if I had a few hours to myself I would start planning all sorts of things to do with my time.  I thought I could paint my bedroom in a couple of hours, even though I hadn’t picked the paint out or moved the furniture yet!  When my daughters started school I would use that dangerous word “should” and I would say things to myself like, “it should only take us 45 minutes to get up and out of the house.”  I would allot 5 minutes to packing lunches, 5 minutes to dressing each girl, etc.  Silly, silly me.  I would get so frustrated with myself and my daughters when my timeline got interrupted.  It is when we do this to ourselves that we find we are grumbling, fussing or even yelling and threatening our children about what we will do if they do not stick to our timeline.  We can terrorize ourselves in the same way as well, giving ourselves an incredibly hard time if we do not stick to the timeline we planned for.

I’m going to suggest an alternative.  Let’s routinely schedule time to stop and delight in our children whenever possible.  When you are planning time, include time to figure out where your children took off your shoes when they wore them around last night pretending to be you.  Schedule in time for when your child asks to help make breakfast and you know it will take longer than if you just did it yourself, or they tell you they promised their friend you would pick them up on the way to school.  I like to give myself 30-45 minutes more than I think I need to do things.  Sometimes this means waking up earlier and planning for fewer things in my day.  It always makes for happier, less frenzied parents and children and an overall more peaceful family.

This weeks affirmation is:

I give myself and my children realistic expectations for managing time.

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June 3, 2012 Posted by | affirmations, help for parents | 6 Comments


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